Conclusion

When I started my Master of Education in Distance Education, I had not written an essay in a very long time. In fact, my confidence in my abilities as an adult learner was low, having had a very mixed record of high and low grades in university.

I had heard Athabasca was more 'open' in terms of entry into its educational programs. A colleague suggested it when I said I was interested in pursuing studies in teaching online learning and distance education. I had been working for years as an instructional designer creating online training and building learning management systems. I felt there was a world of adult learning theory and best practice that extended beyond my corporate company walls, and I was eager to learn about it outside of the scope of my everyday project work. When I received my acceptance letter from Athabasca, I was surprised, thrilled, and not quite sure what to expect or if I would be up to the task.

Writing my first essay was a challenge. I was not used to APA (American Psychological Association) style to cite sources and format my reference papers in a very long time, if in fact at all. But slowly, and with a lot of good references (I relied on the Purdue Online Writing Lab APA Style Guide often), my essays became more clear and coherent, and writing an essay became easier. I started to learn about new tools to catalog my references and sources (diigo and delicious). I organized my learning time, made my deadlines, and slowly learned how to work with others students in the program, as there was typically one group project that was required as an assignment.

Working across distance is something I do as part of my everyday work. There are always colleagues ahead of or behind you when it comes to time zones. Finding a time that works for everyone as part of the work day is hard enough but when it requires carving it out of one's personal time, it becomes even more challenging.

In one of my very first collaborative assignments, I remember working with one of the three other students to finalize the critical journal review that was due that night. We pulled together to complete the assignment while the Olympic gold hockey game between the US and Canada played in the background. As a result of that first group assignment, I learned to always clarify roles and responsibilities and confirm deadlines long before a group assignment was due. Blackboard Collaborate and later Skype became very important tools for me to connect with other participants during these group assignments. At first, these online group meet-ups felt like a chore, communicating for the sake of communicating. But ultimately, they became an important part of the process to have open communication, become familiar with each other, and coalesce as a group.

Discussion forums were another source of angst for me during my studies. I agonized over the rubrics of online discussion, and how to respond to other student posts, while generating my own posts. What did I think of this reading? How does everyone have so much time to respond to every post? Was this person criticizing my position? Eventually, I learned to turn off my internal critic and defender and appreciated the cacophony of the discussion forums. I started by following the advice I received from a colleague who strongly recommended to keep up and not fall behind with the readings. For how can you contribute to the conversation or add your own thoughts, if you have not read the texts that others are discussing? I also adhered to the discussion guidelines presented by each instructor and did what was required. This made the process easier and helped me to stop worrying about whether everyone would get my point. Jumping into online conversations can be much like trying to jump into a group skipping rope. You wait and look for an opening and jump in. But sometimes you must simply jump in. Participating in online course discussion felt awkward at first, but with practice, and turning off my internal critic, it became much more natural, and became a vital source of learning from the program.

The purpose of online discussion was not apparent to me at first. However, when asked at the end of one final course, why self-directed learning has captivated the field of adult learning, it gave me an opportunity to recognize how I had shifted my own thinking about self-directed learning as a primarily inward journey to a more outward one with collective learning and interdependence. I recall writing in one of my essays that we may 'learn for ourselves' but this may not mean necessarily by ourselves. It is not an either or situation. We can be self-directed but also part of a formal or informal structured learning situation. And that is what makes self-directed learning confusing, contested, and captivating. Individuals make up groups, and groups are made up of individuals; it is hard to take the social out of learning, try as we might.

Throughout my studies, I found it helpful to write about my learning experiences in a blog. I started this after my second course in the program. The goal may have started with the attainment of the letters M.Ed. after my name, but it truly changed along the way, and I view reflection as the killer app that helped unlock that. Sustained, consistent writing and reflecting on course readings and experiences yielded for me one of the best learning outcomes from this program. While I benefited from the instructor and other students sharing their perspectives, reflection in the form of this 'private' non-networked learning work shaped my learning discoveries.

The subject of whether there is vulnerability in learning has come up in recent years; and whether it is really a part of learning or a general component of the human experience. For me, processing feelings about learning has been a very large part of the learning process while completing this degree at Athabasca. Along the way, I have questioned whether I needed to be more networked, conversing with others through Twitter, or Google Plus, for example. There is no dispute that by sharing your expertise through social channels and in communities that you are contributing to the 'commons' and that is a wonderful thing. But my journey began with making the learning personal. It is the work we must do - to reflect, put it into context, arrange it, and then relate it; and it is everyone's responsibility to learn if we want to grow.

The first course introduced me to Moore and Kearsley's textbook, Distance Education: A Systems View where the authors trace the history of the term distance education and introduce the major theories in the field. I remember the five generations of distance education that they proposed: starting with correspondence; broadcast radio and television; open universities; teleconference; and finally, internet and web. Open universities struck me as out of place, it was an institution not a technology. At least, that is how I looked at it back then. Now, having benefited directly from the learning in the MEd program, I can say that there is no question that open universities have been and are an important enabler and delivery mechanism in distance education. The Open University in the UK broke down barriers of exclusive education that eluded many potential students. Athabasca did the same for me, giving me an opportunity to study and learn online and receive credit for doing so. With massive open online courses (MOOCs) and other forms of online learning being made more freely and easily accessible to adult learners, open universities may be considered a thing of the past but I hope that there continues to be support for another viable option for adult learners to study on a part-time basis and receive the academic credit they seek. I certainly feel very thankful for the opportunity I have had to learn and grow personally and professionally from my learning experiences in the program.

In my Welcome page, I wrote that my motivation for pursuing a M.Ed. was initially rooted in professional development and advancement. Specifically, I wanted to:

• improve my knowledge of adult education theory and learning strategies to better understand adult learners and the type of support they require in face-to-face, self-paced or online, and blended learning; and
• get a 'wider window' into best practice with non-partisan thinking, perspectives, and research on distance education, learning and teaching solutions.

In terms of professional learning outcomes from completion of this program, I have a much clearer picture of the role of theory and practice. Learning theories are practical in that way, making us test and reflect on our assumptions about the nature of learning and knowledge, and 'to interpret, to make sense of practices' (Edwards, 2005). The benefit to my work is that I am more inclined to research and read theory, look for examples, find out how others are using theory in their areas -- even if it doesn't apply to my learning context, it provides a way to think similar issues and challenges and how one can apply solutions.

Also as a result of my learning from this program, I have clarity in my personal mission as an adult educator where I support adult learning in the workplace by helping colleagues in my organization with rapid change. When I say that I will design online and classroom instruction that values experience, reflection, and dialogue, it now means I know the theory and practice of why this is important based on best practice, and how to test and validate assumptions about learning outcomes in my organization.

In terms of this program meeting my personal learning expectations, perhaps this is where the greater gain has come. I discovered that learning how to learn, meta-cognition, was more than study or research; it also had practical implications for me in my daily life, and was central to my success as a student. In Artefact 3, I alluded to the practice and process of reflection as the 'killer app' of learning. For me, this was such a vital component of my studies at Athabasca. The course discussion forums, my personal blog, course assignments and readings were all opportunities for reflection of which I took full advantage.

In my Welcome page, I also highlighted my son's learning difficulties in his learning journey as an elementary school student started to unfold as my journey as a Masters student began and ended. As a parent, I was worried that having a child deemed 'not ready to learn' meant that he would never learn. Of course, what I have learned is that we all develop our own learning strategies and getting to the state of 'self-directed' is a work in progress. Many aspects are called for when learning how to learn, such as motivation, self-awareness in knowing when your study is important or is derailing other parts of your life, learner confidence or self-efficacy based on past learning experiences, and self-regulation, using positive emotions to regulate learning and manage negative feelings. When this state occurs is different for everyone in terms of typical development age but the most important thing is that all these aspects can be learned.

In answer to this question, yes, I have met and exceeded my learning goals from Athabasca's MEd program!

Thank you to all my fellow learners on this journey and instructors who guided me along the way in learning to learn about distance education and learning.